Mael Beach Man

Big brother arrived at my house last week with his digital camera and a tale of a 'Man' they had made on the beach (him and the 3 bairns), so at 10.15pm I set off to the Mael Sands to see for myself and here he is!
He actually started as a burnt old wooden log which was lying on the beach, so they made eyes, nose and mouth, hair and even took clothes to dress him with.
I said he looked like some kind of god sent to watch over the beach or even an entry for the Turner prize, well let's face it there's a lot more work gone into him as some entries!
As this was last week, I would be interested to know if he is still standing or have the vandals been and had a go?
So there you go Kevin, on the web for all to see!

Issue 11 - the very last one I wrote for the paper that didn't get published

Boring, frumpy, uncool or just plain getting older and can’t be bothered. Whatever you want to call it, I just don’t get the latest fashion trend, which seems to come under numerous headings. Read any glossy mag and you will see, ‘boho chic’, ‘urban cowgirl’, ‘peasant’, ‘gypsy’ and ‘hippy’. What is it with fashion, can’t someone invent something new, why do they have to keep churning out all the old stuff from years ago. A few choice items which really should have been left in the past – batwing tops, drainpipe jeans, rara skirts, legwarmers, the dreaded black leggings (with lycra) and now we are back with the hippy look and as with most fashions past it’s not the kind of thing that just anyone can wear, it always looks good on the models, but then they are all size 8 with legs up to their oxters, unlike normal people. But I guess this hippy phase isn’t all bad, there is some lovely jewellery around, but I say ditch the floggy, cheesy, clothy skirts and floppy hats and stick to what you know.
It’s not always easy to dress for your age, especially when fashion decides to completely confuse and go back a few decades. No one tells you what age you have to be before the words fashion, mutton and lamb are all used in the same sentence. You just need to look at some of the award ceremonies on telly to see what I mean, it’s not so much mutton as old heddery yowe dressed as lamb.
I have finally grown up in the clothes stakes, I now own a proper grown up handbag, having given up buying fashion bags which I then got too attached to even when they were falling apart at their poorly finished seams, only one problem though, how do you clean pink suede without having to take out a loan to cover the dry cleaning costs?
I own a proper wool girly coat which I would even go so far as to say is verging on a style from a past era, but in a very tailored chic way, I also believe in spending serious money on good quality boots and if you count the cost per wear, they really do justify themselves. The last time I was Sooth I bought boots from a grown up real shoe shop (Clarks), I had looked through all the fashion store shoe’s (much to me man’s dismay, he doesn’t like shopping and absolutely hates shoe shopping, as I’m a bit fussy), but just couldn’t find what I was looking for. I wanted walking boots (you know your on the slippery slope when you start to need shoes for a purpose), which were practical and comfy, but still looked nice and something which was not black (do you know how hard it is to find ‘not black’ ankle boots). I have a thing about black footwear, I do own one pair of black boots but only wear them with the one pair of black trousers I own (I have the same problem with black trousers).
But in the end we all wear what we feel good in and who am I to criticise having been through the eighties, but I would like to think I now have the sense to know that when it all comes back around I will leave it up to my daughter to wear.

Issue 10 that never was

I really do love my food, and was recently re-introduced to an old favourite – Mid Brae coleslaw.
As a thank you for doing a Trinny and Susannah on her wardrobe, Sister Susie treated me and big sister to supper. She was actually quite horrified when we had finished the wardrobe and she saw how little was left, but as we pointed out, everything that was left was clothes she actually wore, so she had to agree it was good.
Now I have always had a thing about this particular coleslaw, it’s so creamy, smooth, tasty and home made and the best thing is it doesn’t have any onions (as they do tend to come back on you), in fact the last time I was up in Brae visiting my Mam I went along for a coleslaw takeaway, believe me it’s worth it! So we had a lovely supper, meat salad with big homemade chips (you don’t see those very often nowadays).
I thoroughly believe in what I would call ‘right made food’, and if you are going out for food it should be better than, or at least as good as you can make at home. I won’t say I’m a great cook, because I’m not, I can do what I have to but am not very adventurous, and I tend to stick to the things I like. My Mam loves cooking all types of food, savoury, sweet, baking, you name it she can make it, and she doesn’t have to measure, when I ask for a recipe it’s all, “joost pit in a peerie bit o dis and a handfoo o dat”, I can’t do that, it never turns out the same. Mam loves meat, she actually acquired the nickname ‘Marina 2 meats’, it came from a brother-in-law who was amused that she always had at least 2 meats on the table for a Sunday dinner, it might have been chicken and beef, chicken and pork or chicken and something, but there was always a chicken in there somewhere. I think this 2 meat thing came from when we were all peerie and one meat would never have been enough to feed us, although she did seem to have magic powers over a single pound of mince which she could feed to at least 8 people (I’m lucky if it feeds 3). But I’m not knocking it, I would be highly disappointed if I went for lunch and there was only one meat, imagine?
I am quite fussy when it comes to some things like tea and coffee. My rules are – Tea should come in a packet and be loose leaf which you spoon into a proper tea pot, add boiling water and leave to track. Tea bags are ok if they are herbal, otherwise only use in an emergency. Instant tea, don’t even go there, it should be banned, I just don’t get it!
Coffee should be real, there is just something about the smell (mmm the smell), the taste (rich, slightly burnt) and again it should be made in a pot, either Cafetiere or Espresso, I don’t like percolators, they kill coffee, left to stew for hours, yuk. Instant coffee – no comment. And the finishing touch, a biscuit, as you can’t have a cup without a biscuit, no, really, you can’t.
Must go, I hear the Espresso pot bubbling on the stove and the biscuits are calling.

Me

Where do we go from here?

So, the Shetland Weekly has gone under and I was just kind of getting the hang of writing about stuff that's going on so when big Sis mentioned doing a Blog (well she didn't actually call it that as she doesn't know the right terminology for computer/internet stuff) I said it was something I had been thinking about, but what about all the folk that read my column and don't have access to the internet? she said they would get their bairns to print it off for them, so here's hoping! My first posting in the Blog spot - Wendys Week (why change the name of something that works!). See you soon xx